A Very Metal Holiday Session

On Thursday, I'll be a version running +Michael Curtis's special holiday module, The Old God's Return. I made sure to order it early, so I'd have it for a session before everybody scattered to the winds for the holidays. There's just one problem: +Doug Kovacs. He'll be joining us, and he did the maps for this thing. He knows the adventure. Or at least he did. I've made a few... alterations. Pray I do not alter it further.

This version of the adventure has been "metalized," to accord with the Metal Gods campaign's aesthetic, and its particular idiom. I've been scouring YouTube for obscure heavy metal bands and appropriately themed songs. Inspired by these heavy carols, the Lost Hymns, I have completely fucked up most of Michael's hard work.

As I meditated upon these Lost Hymns, something was revealed to me. For every one of the Metal Gods, there is its opposite: A Disco Lord--a demon prince of overpriced vodka, cheap cologne, and shitty dance music. Gibbandy the Dance Lord is their patriarch. He is not Heavy. He is not Metal. He was cast out of Ore long ago, but his fiendish cult still persists. They have opened a portal to the Land of Rainbow Snow, and Gibbandy's return is nigh. Can the adventurers avert this terrible fate, return Gibbandy and his minions to the remainder bin of history, and escape?

You'll have to wait for the session recap to find out.

Running Background Events in RPGs

One of the most interesting and most difficult things I do in the original settings and campaigns I've run for DCC and Dark Heresy is to create worlds that remain in motion around the characters. That is, many assumptions in RPGs don't really go much beyond what the characters do, to whom they do it, and what happens to them as a result of those specific events. While there are potential ramifications to their actions and the outcomes of those actions, they tend to be very much of a piece.

For example, a group of PCs may have to make a decision about whether an NPC lives or dies. Do they behave mercifully or vengefully? Do they help the NPC advance her cause, or do they thwart it. Clearly, with the hero/villain relationship, this is fairly easy. We try to impede the opposition however we can, and still stay in character (or alignment). So, if Villus the Paladin slaughters a bunch of people, they'd best be Evil. If not, then he can expect to revert to being a fighter for violation of alignment (or some similar outcome). You'll notice, here, that Villus is both connected to, and largely in control of, the thing that happens as an outcome. His actions "cause" it.

But what about things like social relationships between NPCs, or the unfolding of processes that affect the game world, or other things that are largely independent of the PCs' actions? Now the PCs might have some effect on those things, certainly, but they are not the only factor at play.

In Dark Heresy, I used something like this for my Order of The Infinite Way campaign arc. I used a "Plan" for each faction in that game, and provided options for what they might do. These include things like overall strategies the particular faction is pursuing, or tactics they might use to either advance that strategy or to respond to some specific action on the part of the PCs:

House Politics
Depending on how the PCs approach things, they may stir up some of the noble houses, causing them to attempt things they see to be in their best interests.
House Cortenses: Will definitely try to assassinate Paxxu Melus and his closest family, including Paxxu Gloriana.
House de Jagger: Will attempt to stay out of it, and let the local authorities take care of things. Will support their allies, particularly Sapphon and House Dekkarta.
House Dekkarta: Will do their best to keep stable the relations between the houses, but will also be willing to aid PCs if civil war seems imminent.
House Gallo: May use chaos to launch an attack on House Narutha.
House Lemulio: May use the opportunity to betray Sapphon, in hopes of taking over his enterprises.
House Mythrux: Wants desperately to hide its connection to the sorcerous arts. Will aid Willian Bellhouse, if Narutha attacks him.
House Narutha: May use the opportunity to take out Willian Bellhouse, in hopes of taking over his enterprises.
House Paxxu: May use opportunity to attack House Cortenses and take out their young ruler. May also use opportunity to take out Sapphon and assume control of his enterprises.
Criminal ActivityIt may be that the PCs do things to hurt the business of the various criminal gangs.
Willian Bellhouse will be far more likely a target, because of his affiliation with the Cold Trade and House Mythrux. He will attempt to do damage control if it seems like they are getting on his case, even to the point of removing his allies from the picture.
Sapphon will try to keep a lid on things, and will preserve and protect his enterprises. Surprisingly (or not), he will attack anyone who causes damage to the working classes. He will also attempt to help his allies, if help is needed.

 Again, the PCs can affect the action, but the NPCs have their own shit to deal with, and it goes beyond whatever the PCs are trying to do.

For that sort of situation, the PCs act as a trigger for some things. The NPCs may also simply take some initiative if they see an opportunity to do so. Again, the PCs have some role, but the NPCs are independent agents out to serve their own interests. They also, of course, are blinded by their own prejudices, acting on knowledge that only they have, and so forth. This helps the world seem more real to me, and also sets up a situation where those actions (both of the PCs and NPCs) have long-lasting effects. For Dark Heresy, unfortunately, these don't persist in the same way as for DCC. For one thing, the PCs usually move from planet to planet, leaving behind a swath of complications. I don't get to play with those toys again, unless they decide to revisit that place.

In games or campaigns with a more durable locale, this is very different. If the PCs commit a crime, or acquire a noble patron, or otherwise "connect" with the setting, the long-range consequences (for good or for ill) become fodder for additional adventures. Of the blogs I read, I think that +Zak Smith's Vornheim setting seems to get used in his home games in the sense that I'm talking about here. His players do some crazy shit, and they continue to deal with it as the campaign goes on. PCs live, die, leave, come back, etc., but the world just keeps spinning the way it does. The vast undead army doesn't just go back to sleep because a new set of PCs is in play. The world does not "reset." That's cool. I like that a lot.

 The stuff that +Adam Muszkiewicz and I are doing with the Metal Gods of Ur-Hadad campaign is a lot like that, in how it's unfolding. In fact, my players are in the midst of some things that will have some long-term effects, depending on how the game plays out. I don't want to spoil that, so I'll talk more about it in a later post.

One thing I am doing, though, that's interesting (to me) is the playing out of a particular set of interlinked processes. They're happening in the background of the adventure, and they're pretty much independent of the PCs' actions. They are, however, dependent on the actions of the NPCs. They include (without going into too much detail) an attempt to make something happen. I'm running this as a straight d20 check against a DC number. The DC number may be affected by PC actions, by the simple passage of time, or by success on the part of the NPC. Over the course of the game, though, it tends to get easier. For this, I'm having the players make a roll for me. I don't say what it's for. I just ask them to roll. If they do this thing, then Something Important has occurred to a greater or lesser extent. Sometimes multiple successes are required for a particular large Something Important to happen, or maybe those successes amplify the Something Important in particular programmed ways.

The other thing I'm doing is making a check at regular intervals to make a Process play out. The process is an ongoing thing. It will happen unless the PCs are able to intervene. However, until they are in a position to make that happen, it proceeds automatically. For this, I've been using "exploding" dice. If you've not used this before, this simply means that I pick a die type (e.g., d4, d5, d10, whatever). If the rolled result is the maximum, then the die "explodes." You roll it again, and add the result. If that result explodes again, then you roll again and add the result. You repeat this until you finally roll a non-maximum result. So if I rolled a d5, and got a 5, I'd roll again. If I got another 5 I'd roll again. If I got less than 5, then the rolling would end, and I'd total the results. Dark Heresy uses this for damage rolls (Emperor's Fury). It's a fun mechanic, and my players have had some great successes with it, especially +Jason Miller, damn his eyes.

Notice, though, that the d# determines the likelihood of dice explosion. With a d4, you have a 25% chance and with a d10 you have a 10% chance. However, when the larger dice explode, the absolute magnitude of the effect is potentially much greater. It is, though, much less likely to explode in the first place, let alone multiple times in a row.

I'm using this mechanic to model a background process, and to determine the magnitude of its success. I can also use the explosion mechanic to tell me if other, subsidiary effects are accomplished. So, for example, let's say some NPCs are attempting to undermine a curtain wall though the use of sappers. I might say that they have to accumulate a certain total of "labor" for it to happen (The PCs can impede that, of course, but I won't deal with that here.). So, I pick a d6 to represent that process. Since it's an exploding die, it's represented as d6! If I roll a 2, then I simply subtract 2 from the amount of labor the sappers have left to accomplish. If I roll a d6 and the die explodes, then I keep rolling until I achieve a result lower than 6. I total the results and subtract that number from the labor total.

However, a die explosion can be a trigger for some other things. Perhaps it could advance the process up the die chain, making the die a d7 or d8 instead of a d6. Maybe, in-game, this means that they got more conscripted labor to aid the process. Maybe it makes something else happen, even something unrelated tot he process itself (e.g., a new, more powerful NPC enters the lists). Whatever you decide the explosion means, it helps to make the outcome of your process a bit more interesting by adding the possibility of nonlinear results, the introduction of more narrative elements, or whatever else. To be frank, I like it because it creates more chaos in the results. It make surprises happen for me and for the players.

I'll let you know in more detail how this plays out, after this campaign arc ends. Stay tuned.

Addendum: In many ways I'm an RPG sophomore in the original sense of the word: A wise fool. I know a lot about some very specific games (Dark Heresy, Warhammer Fantasy RPG 2nd ed., D&D to some extent), but sometimes attempt to speak outside of that expertise as if I'm an authority. It's the nature of posting a blog, I guess: The presumption to speak with authority. I don't mean to be an ass when I do this. I simply am engaging in a very public form of thinking aloud. So, with this exploding dice thing, it's just a new thing to me. I heard about it. Saw a version of it somewhere. Whatever my encounter with it might have been, it made me think about how I could hack it for my own purposes.

I surmise that someone has probably done what I'm talking about here in a game I'm not familiar with, or has written about it elsewhere. If that's the case, and I'm just repeating their ideas, it's not intentional. I don't play that many games, and don't claim broad RPG expertise. So, when people make reference to what I write about by comparing it to this or that rule in some game I've never heard of, I feel kind of stupid, sure, but I also sort of don't care that much. Oh, I reinvented the wheel? Cool. If it's an original thought, well... that also was an accident. Individual results may vary.

MGoU-H: The Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God, Session 2

When last we left these druken, tentacle-addicted louts our intrepid heroes they had arrived at the port of Samsara, a den of villainy and scum (naturally), only to find it ravaged by Serpent Men. Through questioning of the few survivors, they managed to find their way to the home of Balas Forktongue, a man with a reputation for being odd, even in a place full of weirdos.

They were joined there by another group of zero level characters led by Phil, who will be joining us in our campaign. Phil seems to fit right in, making the absence of +James MacGeorge somewhat easier for us to bear. I handwaved the zeroes in by suggesting that the village (having been annihilated, pretty much), does not really favor the prospects of anyone who tries to return to his or her "old life." So we had a Radish Farmer, a Hunter, a Woodcutter, and an Elven Navigator. The Elven Navigator was someone from one of the recently arrived ships in Samsara's harbor. He claims he's just interested in finding out what's happening. It may be that his motives are somewhat less pure than that, but that's up to +phil spitzer to decide.

My readers may remember that last time the party found Forktongue himself killed in a brutal (totally metal) ritual. This session, Denny Smedd the thief recovered a ritual knife from the victim. There are designs and terrible runes engraved on the blade, and the overall design of hilt and hardware is suggestively Ophidian in flavor. It's made of that extremely hard black metal they keep stumbling across in my games. For mechanical purposes, I needed to make it a thing in the world. So, it's a big knife, bigger than a normal dagger, smaller than a shortsword. So, damage is 1d4+1. It's also made of that black metal, which is harder than steel. So, +1 to hit. I worry that I might be putting too many +1 items in the world. However, given what they're about to face, I probably shouldn't worry too much.

The party (Well, really they are mercenaries, now--They have a flag, you know.) searches the room, looking for whatever they can find. First item of business is a sheaf of papers found in the smashed chest lying next to the hidden compartment in the floor. They were coded in some crude cipher. I gave Formerly Ian the wizard and Nimue the cleric a chance to read them. They were not successful. However, Phil's plucky Woodcutter offered to take a look. BTW, check out this fuckin' guy:

STR 14
AGI 17
STA 10
PER 11
INT 18
LUCK 16

If this poor bastard survives, he should make a really, really excellent thief. He'd also make a really, really excellent wizard. Pretty decent warrior, too, come to think of it. Phil will probably want to keep this 2 hit point prodigy safe and sound until he levels up. The rest of his zeroes seem to have somewhat grimmer prospects. However, this is DCC and we all know that the dice don't favor anyone, longterm. He may fall and some other champion may arise.

Anyhow, the (apparently very well-read) woodcutter crits his check to make sense of the papers (Natural 20+3!).

Here' the relevant section from my module:

A valise containing a sheaf of papers, still lies in the hole.

Note: This chest held The Serpent's Eyes, which were stolen from the Temple of the Serpent God. The papers are in some sort of cipher or shorthand. Any player character with an Int of at least 9 may make a DC 10 Intelligence check to attempt to make sense of them. If successful, the PCs will learn some or all of the following, depending on the degree of success (Give them one of the following items of info for each success, and one additional for every point above the target DC for the check):

The Revelations of Balas Forktongue

1.    This person was Balas Forktongue. He was indeed the contact of Amor Ba'Gish. And there are several correspondences between them in the packet of papers.
2.    Balas Forktongue, his manservant, and four mercenaries visited a ruined temple that lies within the jungle about 10 miles to the northeast of Samsara.
3.    Within the temple, he found a large idol, depicting a huge, two-headed cobra-like, cyclopean serpent, each of the heads containing only one eye. The sockets of the eyes were empty.
4.    They also discovered a vault in the underworks of the temple where two large, red stones were stored in a locked casket of unfamiliar black metal. They managed to open it and removed the stones.
5.    The Eyes of the Serpent themselves were made of a heavy, dark red, faceted stone with luminescent properties.
6.    Balas Forktongue sent a message to Amor Ba'Gish, detailing the find and asking a truly staggering price of 50,000 gold pieces for the Eyes of the Serpent. Surprisingly, Amor Ba'Gish accepted the price without haggling, which fact Balas Forktongue bemoans in his notes. He was sure he could have gotten twice his asking price or more.
7.    There are a variety of mechanical traps which they managed to avoid, for the most part, though one of the mercenaries was grievously wounded, and was later killed by a large lizard
8.    They also managed to escape from a gigantic lizard-like creature. The wounded mercenary and the manservant, on the other hand, were not so lucky. Their deaths, however, allowed the others to escape just steps ahead of the creature.
9.    Balas Forktongue's true target was a weapon he refers to as the Frosthammer of Graki Deathstalker. The Serpent's Eyes were an unexpected discovery, but one that soon became more interesting to him.
10.     The temple contains, at its heart, a gigantic egg-shaped machine, made of the same weird stone as the Eyes of the Serpent.
11.     The name of the temple is Kraa Sssa'a Laass ("Temple of Sssa'a Laass" in the tongue of the Serpent People).
12.     They found strange beings in the temple, their bodies metallic and in the form of Serpent Men. They seemed inanimate, but they were not statues. They had flesh on their forms, but it was cold and unresponsive, though uncorrupted by time. Perhaps they are the guardian the ancient scrolls spoke of (but they don't seem to match the description which suggested that a powerful master of the arcane guards the ruins).
13.    They found other machinery there, but all of their fumbling around with it only resulted in illuminating a red glass panel of some kind and initiating some kind of droning sound which grated on the nerves. They left soon afterward.

So, they party is operating with all of the relevant information. Though the info is not complete knowledge, it's a nice way to start their adventure.

Then the party searched the rest of the place. It was filled with old junk, none of which appeared to be particularly valuable. The also found things on Balas Forktongue's desk:

There is, in addition, at a desk in this room, a long scroll case made of waxed leather. It contains a map showing the coastline, the port of Samsara, and a marked destination some distance to the northeast. The location is on the other side of what appears to be some sort of chasm or ravine. There are a series of notes on this map, sketches of places, a drawing of a magnificent egg-shaped construction, and another of what appears to be, perhaps, a door. The door is massive and decorated with disturbing runes and a large inscription of something that appears to be a war hammer, possibly dwarven, wrapped in the coils of a constricting, two-headed serpent of evil aspect. Next to it is a scribbled note that asks, "Frosthammer of G. D.?"

Also, on the back of the map is a remarkably well-rendered charcoal drawing of an immense tumble of ruined towers and buildings, their cyclopean stones strewn like the dice of the gods themselves, and overgrown with vines and trees. A squat, blocky, roughly pyramidal building with crude snake head architecture, and sitting on a rocky prominence, is marked with the note, "Kraa Sssa'a Laass." The language is Common, but what these words mean is unclear, for they are not words in the Common language.

After some dicking around, it was decided that the party would start out for the temple immediately. The Hunter (Vergil, by name) used his knowledge of the area to inform the other PCs regarding what they could expect from the terrain. Using this knowledge, they were able to make good time. Their trek through the dark jungle seemed interminable, but they eventually followed the game trail to a semi-cleared area. There, the found that a whole lot of the smaller trees had been snapped off at the base. Toward the northeastern side of the clearing, they spotted a teepee-like structure. Vane and Denny decided to have a look. Denny was fairly silent, but Vane sounded like a bus tub full of saute pans. Their movement away from the rest of the party put them about 60 or 70 feet away when Vane's noise woke up this guy:

Four-armed ape-man: Init +3; Atk bite +6 melee (1d6+5) or slam +8 melee (dmg 1d8+5); AC 15; HD 6d8 (27 hp); MV 40’ or climb 20’; Act 4d20; SP rend for additional 1d8 damage if more than 2 slam attacks hit same target in one round; SV Fort +10, Ref +6, Will +2; AL C.

The ape attacked Vane and Denny, clouting them soundly, inflicting damage and knocking them prone. I knocked them prone in lieu of the other two attacks the ape could have made. Basically, I chose to grant the monster an Advantage instead of rolling the other two attacks. However, I couldn't really justify not attacking them at least twice. 

Then the ape saw the rest of the party. Enraged, it charged toward them. Jerkal the wizard (who looks like Kenny Rogers) got hammered by the ape after it beat down Denny and Vane. He was the only guy in the area, and both attacks (again, minimum 2 of the 4 allowed attacks) landed very, very hard. He was reduced to something like -10 hit points.

The rest of the fight was a bit touch-and-go, but the party eventually did in the ape, and didn't take as much damage in the process as they could have. Jerkal was healed by one of our many clerics (a must in this game), but lost a point of stamina, permanently. The other injured party members were also healed. However, Smolken incurred Diety Disapproval, and now will Heal at -1 until his completes a Quest-to-be-determined. Bummer for that guy. Bummer for the rest of the party, too, come to think about it. Dice can be quite contrary in this DCC thing.

So, Virgil the Hunter skinned the ape, Vane claimed yet another set of giant ape balls (*sigh* + *head shake* ... What is wrong with that guy? I think if he were alive today, he'd have a mullet and would drive a truck with those Truck Nutz things on the trailer hitch).

Vane, IRL.

Anywhoooo... The party camped in the clearing overnight, and the new zeroes were introduced to the miracle of Purple Meat, ingesting a dose each of the powdered form of the the Purple Tentacle from Beyond Space and Time. Again, Muppets were witnessed. Other things happened as well, but I didn't write them down so I won't report them here. The important thing is that Phil is clearly fitting in quite well with the rest of this party. Hmm... maybe not "party." More like "Party Van."

Hey, how else you gonna solve a groovy mystery? 

You gotta have one o' these bitchin' vans, right?

So, the Party Van moved out again the next morning. After a few hours, they crested a steep, rocky hill and beheld the temple:

At last the PCs reach the edge of a cliff. Below lay a vast, ruined landscape of broken architecture. The former temple complex has been reduced to little more than house-sized blocks strewn across the landscape. The sole, remaining structure of any note is the Kraa Sssa'a Laass, or "Temple of Sssa'a Laass" dedicated to the two-headed serpent god, whose aspect is that of a cyclopean, two-headed cobra. 

The temple, of course, was across a gorge. The span of the gorge was around 50 feet and it dropped probably 70 feet.

The temple itself is a partially-collapsed, pyramidal structure, overgrown with vines and surrounded with and overgrown by gigantic tropical hardwoods. Colossal snake heads spout waterfalls which cascade down into broken fountains and spillways, and into the gorge itself on the collapsed side, where the temple gapes open.

The gorge itself contains a variety of debris, including what appear to be large statues (of Serpent Men and of Sssa'a Laass, the Serpent God) and other monumental features. The wall of the gorge on the temple side dropped enough masonry into the gap that crossing is possible below.

There is also a waterfall cascading into the gorge, not too far from where the PCs first catch sight of the temple from the trail on the other side of the gorge. (Waterfall Entrance—As the PCs walk down the trail near the gorge, have each player make a single Luck Check to spot, using the highest Luck mod for their PCs) If successful they see what seems to be a natural cave behind the falls.

To reach this entrance, they either (1) climb down over the wet stone surface (DC 10, or DC 5 with rope) from the temple side, or (2) climb down from the Samsara side of the gorge to the massive stone obelisk that spans the gorge to within 8 feet of the entrance. The climb down to the "bridge" is about 50 feet (DC 5 with rope). 

The PCs decided to cross there, though there was a bridge further to the West. Formerly Ian the wizard cast Rope Trick to good effect, and the PCs used it to cross over to the temple. They didn't descend to the entrance behind the waterfall, because they saw a huge lizard come out of that hole and climb off along the wall, to the west (in the direction of the bridge). The lizard was a brilliant yellow color, with electric blue stripes.

In crossing, Banvha the halfling haberdasher almost fell, but used her Luck to survive. I ruled that even zero level halflings can regenerate Luck, as it's a racial trait. Hey, it's a halfling thing. You wouldn't understand.

They made it across the gorge and entered the lower level of the main temple building. There, they found the remains of a fire, and signs of human habitation (smells like piss in one corner). They began to explore the interior when the lizard made its comeback appearance. Here's what they were dealing with:

Spike LizardInit +2; Atk bite +5 melee (1d10) claw +5 melee (1d10); AC 15; HD 3d12 (20 hp); MV 50’/30'; Act 2d20; SP spiky claws on limbs allow creature to climb sheer surfaces at speed of 30; SV Fort +1, Ref +2, Will +1; AL N

Abel the wizard cast summon animal, and conjured a quartet of dogs. They attacked the lizard, and the lizard slaughtered two of their number. Vane thought to go full Steve Irwin on the lizard, but I said that he probably could not actually get his arms around the jaws of the beast. He tried a Mighty Deed to leap upon its back. Failed. Was right in front of it. Eventually, though, the PCs killed the damned thing, and nobody died. Their immediate thought was to make cowboy boots out of the beast's hide. The Banvha the halfling haberdasher thought that was a FABULOUS!! idea. She's got real plans for that hide. Vane is getting into professional wrestler territory, possibly verging on pimpdom, with his wardrobe choices. Sort of a hypermasculine (trying too hard) combination of Rob Halford,

Rob, we love you!

the Road Warriors,

600 lbs of "Please, please don't hit me."

and just a little bit of rainbow viking on a unicorn with an AK-47, if you know what I mean, and I think that you do.

I love giant ape balls in a totally manly way!

In any case, this party will soon be easy  even easier to pick out in a crowd.

Before we ended the session, Ol' Sucker, Clave's Egg-Sucking Hound, and Morfans the Dwarf had gone off to explore the temple's interior. Morfans called out for the rest of them to come quickly. They were confronted with a scene of utter horror:

A grim scene confronts the PCs as they approach the ancient stone altar of the Serpent God. It has been used very recently, and flies swarm everywhere. The altar itself is caked in mostly-dried blood. The bodies of many dozens of children lie in piles here. They have had their throats slit and their hearts ripped from their chests. The hearts are nowhere to be seen, but the blood… oh, the blood. It must have run in rivers for there to have been this much blood. 

And that's where we ended. Call me Captain Buzzkill.

MGoU-H: The Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God, Session 1

So, we started a new adventure arc for Metal Gods of Ur-Hadad (MGoU-H). This time it was me GMing, and +Adam Muszkiewicz resumed his role as player. We were joined by +Gabriel Perez Gallardi, +Bear Philippe, and +Wayne Snyder. Sadly, +James MacGeorge will be leaving the game for a few months. He will be missed in the interim. His character, Crag Beerbeard, was extremely talented with his short bow, and iced many a man-ape (pygmy or white) in his time. 

SPOILER WARNING FOR Jason, from my face-to-face group: I'm going to run this for you guys. Quit reading. :)

When we started the adventure, the PCs were in Tenkar's Tavern, in Mustertown, just outside the walls of Ur-Hadad.

Description from Module:

Not as famous as The Soiled Dove, Tenkar's Tavern is a disreputable place at best, though its owner is a retired city guardsman. He had high hopes that he would be joined by a few of his active and retired brethren in the guard, but instead the establishment tends only to attract travelers from distant lands, adventurers, thieves, thugs, disreputable priests of weird religions, hedge wizards, merchants, and other assorted riffraff. They are a surly lot, and gamble and drink and fight in equal measure.

At Tenkar's the PCs are drinking heavily, and telling tales of their adventures to an incredulous audience. Some mutter that they are lying, and then one of these fellows (ably depicted by this Technoviking image) suggests that, if they're so tough, then they'd best put up or shut up. 

Vane Barbute, the chaotic warrior with a set of giant ape balls (No, seriously. Giant. Ape. Balls.), and always ready to oblige a loudmouth who wants to fight, punches homie in the face before he could even complete the sentence. [Correction: It was Xalto, and it was a headbutt. Thanks +Wayne Snyder!]  And, verily, 'twas on. A bunch of Drunken Louts joined in on the side of the Loudmouth. Their tokens looked like this: 

The internet is just the best sometimes. I mean seriously look at 

this guy. Drinking, dancing waving a sword... What's not to like?

Here's how I hoped to do this scene: 

Run this as it unfolds. Nobody will draw weapons on the PCs unless they draw first; then it's anything goes. Fight until the Loudmouth (below) is knocked out. After that, the others will back off and offer to buy the next round, as it's clearly just a bit of a misunderstanding, right?

 Loudmouth: Init +1; Atk dagger +1 melee (1d4+2) hand to hand melee +2 (1d3+2); AC 12; HD1d8 (5 hp); MV 25’; Act 1d20; SV Fort +2, Ref +2, Will +0; AL C.

 8 Drunken Louts: Init +0; Atk dagger +1 melee (1d4+1) hand to hand melee +2 (1d3+1); AC 11; HD1d6 (2, 3, 1, 4, 2, 2, 2, 2 hp); MV 25’; Act 1d20; SV Fort +1, Ref +1, Will +0; AL C.

 Another person observes the fight, one Azziz, a wizard's apprentice who has been sent there by his master, Amor Ba'Gish, to recruit adventurers for a task. He will approach them after the fight and ask them to talk to his boss about a job offer.  

It ended up being a pretty easy fight for the party. There aren't a lot of nuts the players can't crack with 16 PCs, some of them level 2 already. There were a couple of times when I asked whether or not they really wanted to draw weapons. They, after some consideration, decided that, no, that would be a bad idea. THey were correct. It would have resulted in... trouble for them. They stuck to using fists and feet, and all went pretty well. Lots of 1-shot knockouts occurred, eventually taking out the Loudmouth Drunk. The other guys backed off, bought them drinks.

The PCs, having vanquished the foe, and gotten free drinks for their trouble, talk with this guy, Azziz. I really fucked this up, because I forgot that Azziz was the apprentice. I got it mixed up in my head and didn't call the wizard Amor Ba'Gish. So, those of you who are playing... dude's name is not Azziz. It's the other one, Amor Ba'Gish.

In any case, they got the kid drunk, extracted some information from him in a friendly way, and made their way to the wizard's house, inside the walls of Ur-Hadad. For those not familiar with Ur-Hadad, it's a walled city, and really a sort of gated community created to keep out the riffraff (you know, like the PCs). You need an invitation to enter. Azziz the apprentice got them through the gates and to the house of the Amor Ba'Gish, a nice but fairly modest dwelling of adobe and timber.


When they arrive at the manse of Amor Ba'Gish, he greets the PCs warmly. He's a smiling man of middle years and short stature, with dark skin and green eyes (one of them at least). The other eye is an opalescent, faceted, blue-white gem of some kind, but he seems to be able to see just fine with it. He has long, stiff red hairs on the backs of his hands, though his other hair is dark. He invites them to sit for drinks and a light repast as they discuss the terms of a potential arrangement he would like to make with them. Eventually, the PCs noticed that what they might have mistaken for jeweled pins on his clothing were, in fact, brightly colored spiders creeping hither and yon. He doesn't seem fazed by this, nor does he remark upon it in any way.

Amor Ba'Gish speaks at length about the Serpent Men and their history, and of their downfall after the coming of the Imperial Elves. He's a bit pedantic, assuming that the PCs have no knowledge of the topic, but his main point is that he's interested in their abilities for mayhem. For, while what he's interested in having them do is a relatively routine courier job, the destination is somewhat distant, and the cargo will be extremely valuable, to him at least. He intimates that he's merely a collector of old things associated with the Serpent People. 

When they asked what they'd be conveying, he told them that it would be his payment for an artifact recently recovered by his factor, Balas Forktongue in the port of Samsara. After a check, we discovered the several of the PCs knew Samsara to be a den of scum and villainy, like unto fabled Mos Eisley. It didn't surprise them that such a place would be their destination. The payment was contained in a large, metal chest of dwarven make, with a complex lock of dials and buttons. It's made of stainless steel, and weighs nearly 400 pounds. The thieves did their best (at his urging) to open it. They failed, despite some pretty high rolls. They were also told that the chest contains 50,000 sp worth of platinum (we're on a silver standard, so that's like gp in Ur-Hadad). 

Should the PCs manage to open it, they will indeed find it is full of small bars of platinum, with a total worth 50,000 gold pieces (500 10-gold-weight wafers worth 100 gp each). The chest itself is worth 1,000 gp. Though the chest actually has no additional security measures, its best protection is Amor Ba'Gish himself. For, despite his avuncular manner, he is a terrible enemy. Should they be so presumptuous as to steal from him, and somehow find an antidote for the poison, he will hunt the PCs down using whatever cat's-paws are required to do so. He will get answers about the location of his property, and then he will kill them.

They negotiated the price. He offered 100 sp per PC and 25 sp (total) per day for expenses. They countered with 200 sp per PC, but didn't negotiate higherthe expenses. Eventually, they settled for 130 sp per PC, plus a total of 30 sp per day for expenses. Amor Ba'Gish didn't seem to be too worried about that price, and probably would have agreed to more. In any case, that's fairly serious money for a mere courier job, and the party was a bit suspicious of his generous offer. When asked, Amor Ba'Gish said that the price reflects both the risk faced by the PCs and the value of the object with which they are to return. 

Having negotiated the price, he smiled broadly and proposed a toast to their success, offering them each a small glass of liquid poured into tiny crystal cups from an ancient-looking flask. "This is very difficult to get," he says, "but will perhaps improve the auspices of your journey." At their hesitation, he drank first, to show them it was not poison (though it was poison, actually). I truly expected my players to resist this, but I guess that, with our penchant for sampling all manner of vile brews and arcane substances, they just don't give a shit at this point. So, they drank off the shots. He then immediately informed them of the following: 

 Unknown to the PCs, the glasses are coated with a virtually undetectable (DC 20, but only if looking) contact poison derived from a rare spider. Amor Ba'Gish, naturally, is immune because of his long-standing bond with Atraz A'Zul, Mother of Spiders.

 The poison is long-acting, taking anywhere from five minutes to two months to kill a human target (see below, "Hourglass"). The poison is known as Hour Glass because it's extremely easy to alter the time the death of someone who has taken it, almost to the minute. The period of time can be set by a skilled alchemist with knowledge of poisons and antidotes. Amor Ba'Gish knows these things, and has given the PCs 30 days to complete his task. He will not tell them how long they have, only that they should not delay.

The poison briefly paralyzes the target (about five minutes and then moves into its second phase, where the poison instantly liquefies the victim's innards, making them fit for arachnid consumption. Should they fail to return, they will die horribly. He is perfectly frank in telling them about this, explaining that it is "necessary" given the value of the cargo involved.

 Should the PCs fulfill Amor Ba'Gish's task, he promises to provide them with the antidote, a rare and expensive serum from mysterious Liao, far to the east, and to reward them 100% above the price he had negotiated for their services.

So, after spending some time in Ur-Hadad, provisioning themselves, they made their way to the docks, and their ship. 

Though their passage takes about six days, they are not particularly hindered by the two at-sea encounters they chanced upon--A pride of sea lions (who numbered too few to feel the odds were in their favor, and moved on) and a pirate ship. The encounter with the pirates was more interesting. The wizard Formerly Known as Ian (FKaI) used the helm he got from the Crypt of the Lizard King to guide the ship's captain in among the rocks and reefs, shoreward. I used a series of opposed d20 rolls modified by the helm's bonus (+3) for finding one's way at sea. They weren't particularly successful in getting away, and the pirates were very successful at following them safely through obstacles. Eventually, FKaI just Slept the pirate captain with his foul wizardry (and grew another inch of hair in doing so, because, you know, Mercurial Magic). A couple of crossbow bolts followed, and the pirates failed a morale check. They made their way toward easier prey. 

Hmm... these PCs seem to be pretty formidable. Are my monsters up to the task? Must look into this...

Eventually, the PCs arrive in Samsara. Things are very odd there: 

The PCs arrive at the port of Samsara, only to find it ravaged. Traders from other ports have arrived in the last day or so, and found many of its people slaughtered and the rest, vanished. Some of the citizens of Samsara have since returned from hiding in the jungle, telling outrageous tales about men with the aspects of snakes attacking the town and dragging off the townsfolk, especially targeting the children.

There are funeral pyres burning to the north of the town, on the beach, as is the custom in these parts. In some places there are obvious signs of battle, but not as many as one might think. The attack may have happened during the night, as many of the inhabitants were slaughtered in their homes or even in their beds. Their wounds, from what can be seen, are somewhat different, depending on the victim. Some have puncture wounds, some have large bites taken out of them, and some appear to have been crushed, their bones broken and a variety of fluids dripping from their various orifices. Some have been killed with weapons of various kinds.

Inquiries about the location of Balas Forktongue sent the PCs toward the wealthier quarter of town. As the PCs traveled away from the waterfront, they noticed that people are looting the now-vacant buildings and shops. They also saw their first real signs of sustained fighting: Bloodied cobble stones, dead soldiers, and hacked-apart serpent men with odd spears, the heads of which are twin-bladed and inscribed with strange designs.

Eventually, the PCs were led to a tall, dark stone house, architecturally weird, grim-looking, and carved with hideous creatures of legend and lore and with other odd designs. Any wizard or cleric in the party would recognize that these include runes of protection, prayers, and signs and symbols thought to bring good luck and/or avert bad luck.

An examination of the interior of the house reveals it to be the site of a vile ritual.

The former inhabitant, Balas Forktongue, has been hung by his feet from a beam and his heart cut out of his chest. Strangely, there is little blood in evidence. The victim's skin has been tattooed (or possibly burned) with what appears to be thousands of words in an unfamiliar script. The writing is clearly mystical, and even looking at it causes a sense of unease and revulsion well beyond what seems normal, even considering the condition of the body itself (DC 10 Will Save or dizzy and nauseous for 1d4 hours). Any wizard in the group may be tempted to remove the skin for later viewing. Any attempt to read it requires a Read Magic spell check.

FKaI had Read Magic, used it extremely well, and learned a new 3rd level spell, which I have yet to stat up:

This spell (Inquisition) combines both binding and compulsion, holding its target in thrall and forcing it to answer questions truly—It doesn't matter what language is spoken, as the spell includes a mechanism for translation. It's a 3^rd level spell.

They examined the room by lantern and torchlight:

A large ritual knife made of incredibly hard black metal has been driven through the victim's head, in one ear and out the other. On the floor of the room below the body are figures of arcane design and non-Euclidean geometry (of course), drawn directly upon the stone with a silvery, chalk-like substance, and in the same script with which the body is tattooed.

A brief perusal of the premises reveals a variety of tomes of lore, an apothecary cabinet and alchemical apparatus, and a variety of weird implements. The PCs also find a small chest made of dark wood. It is now smashed open. It lies next to a hollow in the floor. A flagstone was removed, exposing a hidden space beneath it, where the box was, one presumes, hidden.

And that's where we had to stop, as we'd run over our allotted time by about 45 minutes. Got to work on that whole time management thing, maybe, though my players didn't seem to mind too much.

So, next time, the PCs will investigate the scene of the crime, as it were, and try to determine what can be learned from the house, possessions, and desecrated corpse of Balas Forktongue. 

Preview: The Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God

Okay, so I've taken a few days to recover from my furious Zappadan blogging marathon. It was an interesting experience for me. I had to blog every day. I had to blog about the same two general topics every day. I had to make connections between the those two topics every day. I had to do it for 18 days. Not every post was a gem, mind you. But there were a few nice ones.

By and large, I succeeded at those tasks. Yeah, I missed a day when I got overwhelmed by pre-vacation work concerns. Yeah, maybe one or two posts were only loosely connected to each other. Fine. That's just fine. The overall result was an excellent exercise in writing as a craft. I remember a quote I heard a few years ago that's stuck with me. I thought it was an Arthur Miller quote, but can't find the source of it. In any case, when asked when he found himself inspired to write, he said that he finds his inspiration at about nine a.m. when he arrived at his office, and lost it promptly at five p.m., when it was time to leave.

For all of our notions about talent and inspiration and whatnot, what many people seem to forget is that a lot of what gets mistaken as great individual work is founded on all of the prior work. People who produce a lot tend to produce better quality stuff over time, simply because they both (a) have more chances to do so and (b) have more chances to improve their craft over time. So, hopefully my foray into forced inspiration helped me to progress as a writer.

Okay, so it's time to pimp the next Metal Gods of Ur-Hadad campaign arc: The Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God. This is my second foray into writing DCC modules and I think it's pretty decent. One problem I'm having right now is trying to decide whether or not my players will be able to "beat" the module. Now, to be clear, there are two issues here: The less important one is "balance" between the PCs' capabilities and the challenges represented in the module. The more important one is that the outcome of this adventure, should they not "win," will have far-reaching consequences for the adventure setting, most of them unpleasant.

I'm trying to be careful not to spoil it, as some of my players probably will read this. Hi, guys!

So, as a more general question to any of you out there who have written original adventures, how much do you worry about overpowering your players, TPK, Pandora's Box effects springing from the less-successful outcomes? For my part, it's something I think about, but then go, "Fuck it. This is DCC, not 4th ed. Even if they are unsuccessful all die, it will be awesome."

Hmm... what else can I say about this adventure? Here's a short list:

This is gonna be a groovy mystery.

Oh, sexy Velma... you will be mine.

There will be a new patron and a new god.

Sorry, kids! No spoilers here. I want it to be a big surprise.

There will be more grimdark elements than last time. 

But seriously I hate these douchebag turtles.

One scene I debated about including is particularly disturbing to me.

Like, getting into Baby Kobolds/Raggi territory with this one (Hi, James! Hi, Zombie Gary!). I don't watch horror movies. I'm not interested in horror movies. Nonetheless, what happens in this adventure is thoroughly horrible, and it's include as, frankly, the reason for why we fight the encroaching darkness. I want my players to feel some measure of outrage at The Adversary, at their lot in life, at the fact that they're gonna be marching through miles of jungle in fantasy fucking Vietnam. Yeah, this is gonna be gooooood.

This adventure was written as a movie script. 

When I set out to write this, I intentionally did it as if it were a film. It's got a strongly visual theme in my mind, and I looked at a lot of pictures on the Internet to get the right feel for it. I know what this place looks like, smells like, sounds like. I'm ready to capture some fucking imaginations, people!

The outcome could potentially change the world, and in a very, very bad way (for humans).

So, this is Ur-Hadad. Ur-Hadad is not a nice place. It's a dangerous place. It's a post-Apocalyptic place. It could very quickly become the very Hell you thought we'd already overcome. The Metal Gods are not the only gods in creation, and those who are down are not always out, gods or mortals. Failing in their mission, the PCs will have failed both Men and Gods. No pressure, though. Just don't fuck up.

We're using real dice.

I have come to a conclusion. If I'm going to fail, it will be while rolling my own dice, not while waiting for someone's random number generator to stab me in the fucking back. Dice rollers are all well and good, but I've got dice. You've got dice. Let's use our dice. I won't lie to you, and you won't lie to me. Unless you want to, because that's what makes it fun for you. It really doesn't matter. But: I'm not going to fudge the results. Monsters like to score a crit every once in a while, too. Who am I to deny them their fun?

I've used a forced writing technique with this one, as well.

As I mentioned, the band High on Fire provided song titles for the various scenes in this "film." Not every one of them fits well, but I've tried to make every one of them fit somehow. With titles like "Frosthammer," "Snakes for the Divine," "Master of Fists," and "Serums of Liao" how could I possibly go wrong?

This is gonna be SO! MUCH! FUN!

Metal Gods of Ur-Hadad Update (Dec. 2012)

Okay, so it's time for a non-Zappadan post. I'm sure not all of you are as thrilled by them as I am, and (though I try) they are only loosely linked to gaming by whatever rickety connection I might happen to make. Blame some part of that on work being a little crazy lately. I'm trying to post what I can when I can, so it's not always as coherent as it could be. So...

I've had a chance to work both sides of the table in the Metal Gods of Ur-Hadad campaign, and wanted to both assess where I'm at as a result, as well as to give you folks some ideas about what to expect in the future. I guess the main audience I'm talking to are the guys in the gaming group, but anyone else reading may glean something of use from this. I'm gonna break it into sections for clarity's sake.

Interface: Roll20

I've enjoyed using Roll20. The learning curve hasn't been too frightful, but I'm still learning new things. I keep meaning to figure out the macros for dice rolls, but it's not important enough that I've actually taken the time to do it. Yes, I'm the dickhead who makes everyone wait while I roll. While I like the interface and appreciate the whole "putting it up where everyone can see" part of it, I think it would be quicker to roll physical dice and report the results verbally or in text chat. It may just be my preference, but I do find that we are waiting on each other a lot due to having to engage the die roller.

As far as mapping goes, I did it with the interface, and drew line maps. Then I placed various (free) tokens I was able to find for that purpose. I think it worked fine once it was all in place. But then I saw Adam's maps. Hand-drawn/Painted maps, evocative as fuck, and totally capturing the vibe he's going for. I'm going to have to get a flatbed scanner at some point. I need to up my game. Either way, the tech works okay for mapping. It's quite easy once you get the hang of it. Sure, it sometimes gets a bit wonky for particular players, depending on their browsers/computers/Internet provider/environmental conditions. It's the Internet. I'm used to these things.

There are also some nice apps for hangouts. Someone recently added the RPG Toolkit. I've only just started messing around with it, but it looks good.

Overall, as I've said, I like the interface. It works well for what it's supposed to do, but it can be kind of a time suck and always affects the pace of  play (sometimes drastically). More tasks to accomplish, less familiarity with said tasks, and variable complexity even with routine tasks (e.g., die rolls) results in a lot of time not spent talking to each other. Surprisingly, though, the chat window has become both a good place to track things like initiative, die rolls, etc., but it's most interesting and fun use is just joking around with each other. Having the map integrated means you don't have to keep switching windows. That's super terrific.

Here's the thing, though. I feel like that technology does at times get in the way of the "hangout" part of the equation. It sometimes adds a layer of separation between (particularly) GM and players, and can decrease the connection between them. If the GM is not ready with tokens and so forth before the session (both Adam and I had this problem) it can take a while to do. The initiative tracker is probably not needed, really, given the amount of time it takes. I prefer to just write it down on some scratch paper. Works fine.

In the end, it's super important to keep track of how using things like Roll20 or Tabletop Forge break the flow of the game, and to try to overcome those. You could find the most efficient ways to do things (e.g., macros for die rolls) or maybe not use certain functions because they just add to the workload. Video chat is already pretty far removed from actual face to face interaction. Resolution, mic quality, environmental factors, etc., already make it harder to communicate. So it's important to recognize places where you're possibly further degrading the quality of human interaction. If the band's on the stage fucking with their equipment, it's not real entertaining. Once they're plugged in and in tune, it's time to rock. Any delays of said rocking are a bummer.

Gaming Group

I'm going to say it. You're just gonna have to believe it. This is once of the funnest groups I've ever gamed with, probably the best. My face to face group is very good, but we have problems with commitment and with interest in and enjoyment of particular systems. It's not dysfunctional or anything, but there are things that make it a less perfect situation. For the hangout DCC game, though, it's like we're all on the same page just about every time. These are people who came to have fun. Fun they shall have, and have been having.

The Game

I know you know this: I love this game. It's a lot of fun for me to play in and to run. I'm going to keep playing it for a while.

The crazy magic is really, really fun. It can be frustrating as hell, but when a spell goes right, and your wizard sleeps every one of the enemies at once (and grows an inch of hair all over his body, because MERCURIAL MAGIC! Yay!), it's worth every chaos mutation. It's totally worth it.

I had something happen in Adam's game during our last session, and I'm amazed by it. Last night I lost another zero-level funnel character (Yeah, so?). Her name was Xandra and she was gonna be a wizard (17 Int!). But she was wounded, down to 1 hit point. The situation was grim. We were under assault by two groups of ape men, and the rolls weren't going our way. The enemy's rolls, of course, were going very well indeed. I (foolishly) pulled her from the background and sent her to shore up our ranks on the left side. She was dead of a brutal crit within a round. And Adam had made me a really cute anime-looking token for her and everything. So, I killed her. I'm still pissed about it. So don't tell me that your zero-level pukes aren't worth rooting for. Xandra was special, and now she's fucking dead, man! *sniffle* So there's that.

I guess this may be as much about the players I'm gaming with, but I feel like the different classes really do a good job of bringing different things to the game. When you are a warrior, you are there to kick ass, and do so with whatever comes to hand (monkeys!). Clerics are running around healing and trying to get in swings with their weapons. Wizards are sitting back there like living timebombs, just waiting to explode on someone (hopefully not you). Dwarves just ready to cut you or bash you with the shield. This is like a regular warrrior but with an added "pimp slap" feature. Most satisfying. We haven'd had any elves or halflings survive funnel yet, but I'm hoping we'll get some at some point. Well, halflings anyway. Damned elves and their oppressive ways! I'm no tool of The Demi-Man.

I guess I'd like to do more stuff with the game, like leveling and such, but we just haven't gotten there yet. We will, though. We will.

Metal Gods

We're still sort of filling in the details on the Metal Gods. We're keeping it a bit hazy on purpose, though I'm a bit more obsessed about those details than Adam is. Just my nature. Here's what I've learned so far.

• They are a pantheon and it's not cool to single out just one for worship.
• They have something to do with music and rocking out. 
• They are also associated with making things, with technology as well as magic.
• They expect you to do things with style and gusto. This is very important. Don't bring that weak shit, pal, they will not be impressed.
• The sorts of things they demand in sacrifice are different, and might be found on or backstage, or on the tour bus.
• They are ready to rock, always.

Here's a Metal God for you:

Lemm

Lemm is one of the Metal Gods associated with war and contemplation of the desolation that it brings. He is the god of the lost cause, the forsaken youth, and the conscripts whose blood helps keep full the coffers of the nobility, bankers, and merchants. His sacred festival spans the days before, during, and after the Winter Solstice. During the festival, it is customary to gather in groups of three (and no more than four) to drink to the dead with toasts of whiskey and to smoke tobacco or stronger things, like the Purple Meat. 

So, there's also Obhal the Iron Eagle, but I haven't written him yet.

Upcoming Campaign

Right now I'm writing a campaign arc called "Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God." It's going to be a bit of jungle hex crawl and a bit of dungeon crawl. There's also going to be a bit of sleuthing involved, as there is a mystery to be solved. 

The players will definitely see some great fantasy artwork (not my own, sadly) like this here:

It will introduce a new patron (Atraz A'zul) and provide a bit more of a glimpse into the lives of the Serpent People, at least in an archaeological sense. Maybe, though, they'll put on a "live" appearance. 

This adventure also will feature critters generated (semi)randomly from the Random Esoteric Creature Generator. It's cool. You should get it.

The adventure's different scenes will be named after songs by the band High on Fire. In some ways, this has proved very challenging. In others it's really working well, and contributing mightily to my narrative and to my sense of the gameworld we're assembling in the space where the Wilderlands used to live.

(SPOILER ALERT) This will be used. No, I won't tell you how it will be used.

There will, of course, be plenty of opportunities for my players to face great peril and to gain great rewards. But will they solve the mystery of the Mysterious Temple of the Serpent God? That remains to be seen.

So, there. A real update to do with actual gaming. I knew I had it in me.

Bonus Content + Clue for Players:

Blacked out sky, and beliefs in pillars time

Manifest death and our killers come to life

Breaking this spell and end my master's life